My Story
I have always loved music. It has always brought comfort to me. I remember when I was in elementary school, the Utah Symphony came to play. I was mesmerized! I couldn't believe how beautiful each instrument sounded! At that moment, I knew that I wanted music to be part of me.
I signed up for band and learned to play the flute and trombone. I loved every moment in my band classes all the way through high school. My mother has always been an amazing pianist. I learned the basics in piano playing from her and then continued to teach myself. I remember entering an original piano composition in a music contest in high school. To my absolute surprise, I won 1st place. I did not know I could even write music. I could barely play what I had written, but there it was. I realized at that moment that I had an ability to put notes together on a page. I wrote a few more original piano pieces to continue to learn and improve. I loved it!
Well, high school came and went, college also came and went. Oh, but I had a marvelous time in college though. I served a mission for my church in Donetsk, Ukraine. I graduated with my bachelor’s degree in International Law and Diplomacy from Brigham Young University and thereafter spent many years living in Russia and Ukraine. I loved every moment. I came home and met up with a fellow trombone player from my band in high school (Jason Henry) and three years later we were married. It was a marvelous day! A truly marvelous day! We were married in the Bountiful, Utah temple on November 12, 2004.
Jason and I were anxious to have children from the get-go. We were so excited to become parents. After four and a half years of prayer and visiting infertility doctor after doctor, our beautiful daughter Emily was born to us. What a miracle she was and still is in our lives. We love her dearly. We didn't think our love could expand any more than that, but the heavens had other ideas for us. 19 months later, our twin boys were born. Gabriel and Spencer! Our lives would never be the same again! What amazing boys they are! We were blessed again 22 months later with our wonderful son, Jacob, and again in another 22 months after that with our fourth son, Dylan. What a beautiful family we had! Jason and I couldn't love them more. 26 months after Dylan was born, Madeline came from heaven to join our family!! What a joy she is to us! We love her to pieces!
After our sweet Madeline was born, I was not feeling quite right. My brain felt foggy. It was hard for me to find joy and peace. I could not understand how I could be blessed with such a loving husband and six beautiful children, who are all amazing little spirits, and struggle to find joy in my life. I prayed and read my scriptures, but still struggled. I remember days just holding my head and thinking, "what is happening? Where is the joy that I desperately want to feel?" After reaching out to trusted friends and family and through the unrelentless love and support of my dear husband, I finally understood that it was time to go see my doctor. I was told that I was experiencing post-partum depression. I had never experienced anything like this before. I did not understand how or why it had happened. It was incredibly difficult. I depended on my husband to lead and guide our family during that time as I was working on getting better.
I remember one day pondering about different ways that had brought me joy in the past. I remembered about music. I remembered sitting at the piano, with my dad sitting in his recliner next to me with his eyes closed, asking me to keep playing for him. I had remembered that several years ago, I had written a hymn arrangement for vocal solo with piano accompaniment, "I know That My Redeemer Lives" for a missionary that I had known. It was a simple, short arrangement. I looked everywhere for it and finally found the first two pages. There were originally three. My mind reflected on the time I sat at the piano trying to add my testimony through music to that hymn. I enjoyed it. I thought music might be a way to find that joy in my life that I once felt so easily. I started writing an arrangement for "Our Savior's Love". It was my favorite hymn. I just wanted to see if I could still write. It took me a solid month of writing, but I remembered. I remembered how it felt to feel the inspiration from heaven as the music notes hit the paper. I could feel my heart swell as I continued to write. How grateful I am for music.
I have learned that music is a conduit to heaven. Power of music can be felt by all of God's children. It can be written as an expression of love and gratitude to our Savior for his infinite atonement for each of us. I am still learning every day though. Oh yes, every day is a learning experience for me - how to love like the Savior loves, how to have patience with my children, how to be a loving and supportive wife to my dear husband, how to serve and how to better show gratitude. Life is a process of growth. I know that our Heavenly Father gives us beautiful ways to feel of His love for us. Music is one of those ways.
I have always loved music. It has always brought comfort to me. I remember when I was in elementary school, the Utah Symphony came to play. I was mesmerized! I couldn't believe how beautiful each instrument sounded! At that moment, I knew that I wanted music to be part of me.
I signed up for band and learned to play the flute and trombone. I loved every moment in my band classes all the way through high school. My mother has always been an amazing pianist. I learned the basics in piano playing from her and then continued to teach myself. I remember entering an original piano composition in a music contest in high school. To my absolute surprise, I won 1st place. I did not know I could even write music. I could barely play what I had written, but there it was. I realized at that moment that I had an ability to put notes together on a page. I wrote a few more original piano pieces to continue to learn and improve. I loved it!
Well, high school came and went, college also came and went. Oh, but I had a marvelous time in college though. I served a mission for my church in Donetsk, Ukraine. I graduated with my bachelor’s degree in International Law and Diplomacy from Brigham Young University and thereafter spent many years living in Russia and Ukraine. I loved every moment. I came home and met up with a fellow trombone player from my band in high school (Jason Henry) and three years later we were married. It was a marvelous day! A truly marvelous day! We were married in the Bountiful, Utah temple on November 12, 2004.
Jason and I were anxious to have children from the get-go. We were so excited to become parents. After four and a half years of prayer and visiting infertility doctor after doctor, our beautiful daughter Emily was born to us. What a miracle she was and still is in our lives. We love her dearly. We didn't think our love could expand any more than that, but the heavens had other ideas for us. 19 months later, our twin boys were born. Gabriel and Spencer! Our lives would never be the same again! What amazing boys they are! We were blessed again 22 months later with our wonderful son, Jacob, and again in another 22 months after that with our fourth son, Dylan. What a beautiful family we had! Jason and I couldn't love them more. 26 months after Dylan was born, Madeline came from heaven to join our family!! What a joy she is to us! We love her to pieces!
After our sweet Madeline was born, I was not feeling quite right. My brain felt foggy. It was hard for me to find joy and peace. I could not understand how I could be blessed with such a loving husband and six beautiful children, who are all amazing little spirits, and struggle to find joy in my life. I prayed and read my scriptures, but still struggled. I remember days just holding my head and thinking, "what is happening? Where is the joy that I desperately want to feel?" After reaching out to trusted friends and family and through the unrelentless love and support of my dear husband, I finally understood that it was time to go see my doctor. I was told that I was experiencing post-partum depression. I had never experienced anything like this before. I did not understand how or why it had happened. It was incredibly difficult. I depended on my husband to lead and guide our family during that time as I was working on getting better.
I remember one day pondering about different ways that had brought me joy in the past. I remembered about music. I remembered sitting at the piano, with my dad sitting in his recliner next to me with his eyes closed, asking me to keep playing for him. I had remembered that several years ago, I had written a hymn arrangement for vocal solo with piano accompaniment, "I know That My Redeemer Lives" for a missionary that I had known. It was a simple, short arrangement. I looked everywhere for it and finally found the first two pages. There were originally three. My mind reflected on the time I sat at the piano trying to add my testimony through music to that hymn. I enjoyed it. I thought music might be a way to find that joy in my life that I once felt so easily. I started writing an arrangement for "Our Savior's Love". It was my favorite hymn. I just wanted to see if I could still write. It took me a solid month of writing, but I remembered. I remembered how it felt to feel the inspiration from heaven as the music notes hit the paper. I could feel my heart swell as I continued to write. How grateful I am for music.
I have learned that music is a conduit to heaven. Power of music can be felt by all of God's children. It can be written as an expression of love and gratitude to our Savior for his infinite atonement for each of us. I am still learning every day though. Oh yes, every day is a learning experience for me - how to love like the Savior loves, how to have patience with my children, how to be a loving and supportive wife to my dear husband, how to serve and how to better show gratitude. Life is a process of growth. I know that our Heavenly Father gives us beautiful ways to feel of His love for us. Music is one of those ways.
